Many mages consider it impossible to create a winged hippopotamus. Or is it?
Sometimes I randomgen a spell or magic item that is so complicated to describe I know it won’t fit on a twitter post. So I’ve saved them for here.
Complicated Magic
| Book of Dragon Coloring: Contrary to popular belief, most dragons lead dull existences. When they’ve gotten to an age where there are few creatures left they can’t defeat, and their treasure piles full to overflowing, they can often fall into ennui. This giant-sized book of intricate drawings is the solution to that problem. It comes with sapling-sized pigment sticks of different hues the beast can use to color in these drawings, bringing them some happiness and sense of accomplishment.
Calligraphy of the White Kraken: These special characters for writing magic spells were created by the enigmatic mage of the same name. They can only be used in spells involving the sea and increase their efficacy by 25%. Card of Easy Gestures: Enchants a plain white card with a list of gestures, and their meanings, of any different race or culture the caster encounters. That way the caster can always refer to the card if they don’t understand what the other being is communicating to them. Cauldron of The Drunken Warlord: This plain black kettle was owned by a mighty general of a nomadic people who was prone to drunken rages. Therefore, he had it magicked to always sit on its fire and keep bubbling, no matter what physical force hits it. Create Winged Hippopotamus: Not a real spell, but a lesson teachers of magic often apply to their students. They assign them this spell and see how well they create a solution. But the solution is never the right one, because there is no way even with magic that a hippopotamus can fly. Gerdyar, Ring of the Scarlet Necromancer: A ring that can summon a ghostly red-cloaked necromancer who can animate corpses. This being can cast spells, speak, and can be commanded. The wearer of the ring is not able to see the necromancer, but can see the effect of its work. It is never hostile to the wearer. Larka’s Apple: Creates a huge apple-like fruit with leathery brown skin. This fruit is roughly the size of a watermelon. When the skin is sliced into, one hundred smaller, heart-shaped fruits come spilling out, each containing a nectar that satisfies a human’s food and water requirement for one day. The heart fruits must be eaten within 24 hours or they will all wither. Law Controllers of Ossoth The Humble: A set of legal rules written on indestructible paper to govern how people interact in a guild. For example, one rule is that only people who are a member of the guild can use the guild shop to sell their goods. The rules are magic in that they compel all who enter the guild’s headquarters to obey them. Lungs of The World Tree: This spell makes the caster’s lungs so powerful they can survive any attempt at suffocation, any poison gas, any lack of breathable air. They are also able to blow out a gale force wind, or inhale at the same speed. Lastly, it amplifies their singing, speaking, or shouting power so they can be heard up to a mile away. Ophayaë-Balso, also known as The Box of the Dragonfly: This mysterious artifact is made of a mixture of gold and copper and resembles a small oval box with the image of a dragonfly stamped on the lid. It contains six different kinds of health potions that never go empty. The potions are as follows: throat-soothing medicine; bile infusion for healthy digestion of food, blood-clotting solution; universal poison remedy; mollusk or pus remedy; and a tonic for an athlete’s rubdown. Pastilles of Agility Reduction: This clay bottle of large, multicolored pills radiates magic, but instead of being helpful they reduce a being’s dexterity, 1 point for each pill, for 24 hours. Usually takes a character a while to figure out the correlation because they also act as an analgesic. Prismatic Trumpet: A shimmering, multicolored trumpet that can summon a number of jesters to play a merry tune that can be heard at least 500 yards away. They play for 1d4 rounds before vanishing. The trumpet is indestructible and can summon an unlimited number of jesters. Scorpion Abacus: Looks like an ordinary wooden abacus, but when a user moves the beads around each one begins to secrete an oily, deadly poison through small grooves in its surface. The greater the calculations made by the user, the more chance there is of the poison entering through a fingertip and then into their bloodstream. The poison acts just like that from a giant scorpion. Teapot of The Lord’s Peerage: This ornate silver teapot is sure to enhance the reputation of any mage. Not only can it pour any kind of tea in the world, whoever drinks that tea will treat the mage with utmost respect, seeing them as a peer no matter how highborn they are or how humble the mage. Terrarium of Desire: This spell is used to make someone fall in love with the caster. It entails setting up a small glass bowl with dirt, rocks, seedlings, etc. and taking care of it until the terrarium is thriving. At the point one of the seedlings flowers, the spell is complete and the lovelorn one comes knocking on the caster’s door. However, if the terrarium is destroyed, or allowed to wither, that love is gone, never to return. Zifrost’s Venomous Yellow Dye: This yellow powder seems to be only a pigment that dyes fibers or fabrics the color of saffron. But in the hands of a chaotic evil mage it can be used to endow clothing with a horrible curse — the first time the owner of the garment tries it on, it melts their skin off as if by a powerful acid. See the tale of Nessus the Centaur. |
